DEDICATED SUMMER SCRIBES
Crystal, Charity and Luke joined me for a Meeting on Wednesday, which was both the longest day of the year and the first day of summer. We did decide that the Rams will continue to meet during the summer months this year. I don’t know if that was so much because we are all such dedicated, enthusiastic writers as because none of us were planning to go away on vacation this summer! So if persistence pays off for writers, we should be on the right track.
Charity read first, the next chapter showing Trixie waiting on a ledge for an hour after the posse leaves. She felt dirty and in need of a bath. She heads for a hideout her Pa used to go to and on the way finds a secluded pool. She strips and bathes but then is attacked by a mountain lion. She fights back with a knife and kills it, and she is left badly injured. This chapter was fraught with tension and the reader will keep turning pages to find out what happens next to Trixie.
Luke read to us of Goren waking up on the mountain to find the celiat has left him. He packs up and takes an easier route home, now that he isn’t tracking anything. When he arrives home, he finds the house empty and with his parents and his sister all away. He falls asleep with his boots on, but awakes to the ground shaking. This leaves us wanting to know what’s causing the shaking, an earthquake or invading troops?
Chrystal read a poem called “Stutter” which exemplifies how words (or sounds) can keep repeating inside the head without being able to speak them out loud and communicate deep emotions that are felt.
I read the last “Honey” story in my collection, which is called “Locked Out” and tells of Honey usurping my space in the den and my thinking I’m being blocked from doing any writing. But then I use that time to sit with my printed manuscript and do some editing with my red pen. Charity said it reminded her of a similar situation at her house lately. It’s wonderful if we have our own space to write in, but if we are dedicated writers we should be able to write anywhere, with any tools available. That’s what I keep telling myself anyhow.
With time still left in the Meeting, we segued into reading our own poetry, except for Luke, who says he doesn’t write poetry.
Charity read “This Old Tree” about an old tree that stands strong in the wind.
Crystal read “Open Up”, talking about her mother’s tongue of razor blades, her father’s chest being cut open, and through all the pain and despair and destruction, still feeling alone. Very haunting. The next poem she read was a rhyming one called “About Me”, trying to define herself.
I read “The Question Of Love” which lists all the myriad ways that love can manifest and is always different with each person loved. Then I read “Sweet Betrayal” about a man’s misplaced devotion to the lady in the bottle (alcohol) and how she slayed him.
I told those present about a used bookery/coffee shop I discovered in Aldergrove called Book’N’Bean. Nice ambience where you can browse the books, buy a coffee and sit and read. You can also trade in your used books for credit on buying other used books. They are at 27103 Fraser Highway. Keep them in mind if you are in that area or need an afternoon getaway.
Next Meeting will be Wednesday, July 5th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place that now sports a bright blue door. Can’t miss it! Have a Happy Canada Day in the meantime!
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Friday, June 23, 2017
Saturday, June 10, 2017
THE REVIEW
TWO IN ONE
Had a great Meeting here on Wednesday after the cancelled Meeting in May due to the car accident in which I suffered some injuries. Have mostly recovered now and can type again so no more excuses for not writing a Review. Will try to incorporate information from both of the last two Meetings to make up for the missing Review.
At the Meeting in May, Margaret F. read a fictionalized chapter from “Babes In The Wood” in which she tells about a young Clifford Olsen who was always in trouble and had a penchant for torturing birds. While his father was horrified, his mother seemed to make excuses for him. It should be interesting to see how Margaret ties this in with the rest of the investigation of the murdered children found in Stanley Park.
At two different Meetings, Luke read about Goren still at the cave where he killed the snake. He skins and cooks it and shares the meat with the celiat and then cleans up and prepares the skin and head to transport home as trophies. He decides to wait for sunrise before travelling and remembers the past when he decided to stay out of the combat troops of the military, in spite of what others thought. He became a lone hunter, like the celiat, which slept beside his tent that night.
Charity read twice about Trixie. After the girl had killed Brett, she takes his boots and knife and runs, afraid of being caught. She runs a zig-zag pattern to make it hard for Marley and his posse to track her. Hidden among the rocks in the sweltering heat, she sees the minister on horseback, sitting and watching the valley below. She forces herself not to move, trying to outlast his vigilance. Lots of tension in this scene.
Annette also read at both Meetings from the story she had started. Maxine was wanting to end a relationship with a man named Jarod. But he had been injured in a motorcycle accident and she needed to take time off work even though her boss wanted her to leave the man. She is at the hospital and meets a Ray Matthews, dressed in a coat and stethoscope, who tells her about Jarod’s injuries and asks for her signature for Jarod to have surgery. She questions the legality of her signing for that, but is told since there is no other family and that she had previously been designated temporary substitute decision maker, that her signature was valid. She realizes that Jarod will probably live and recover and that he needs her to help with that, but consequently she would have no freedom. Desperation is sometimes born of sacrifice to the needs of others.
I had read two Honey stories. In May I read “Reluctant Mr. Fixit” about Honey telling me he was done after doing three chores for me at home. Then I read “Lost And Found” about our road trip to Thunder Bay and the trials and tribulations of so much togetherness, ameliorated upon finding home again.
Guy didn’t read in May, but did at the last Meeting. He said he is just jotting down events in rough draft and read this time about George as a teen living with his grandmother, and being more interested in partying and drinking with his friends than school. He had a dream of being a pilot, though, and applied for ROTC with the Air Force. His application was accepted but when he went for the physical exam it was discovered that he was colour blind and his dream was denied.
Crystal Colligan was a new member who joined us for the first time on Wednesday. She writes mostly poetry and shared with us that a lot of her writing was about being recovered from anorexia. She read to us a poem entitled “Broken Things”, and it was raw, pulsating pain trying to survive past hurts and re-invent herself, and not at all sure of who she should be. This poem was naked emotion on the page and we hope will find publication somewhere. And Crystal did say she writes a blog, so we will have to ask where to find it.
Somebody asked me if the Rams were going to take some time out during the summer, and I replied I didn’t know. So give that some thought. In the past we have sometimes taken the month of August off, so if people want to do that, we can. I don’t have any travel plans this summer, so to keep having Meetings during July and August is fine with me if others want to attend. We will decide at the next Meeting, which will be Wednesday, June 21st at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. I look forward to seeing you then, which will be the longest day of the year!
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Had a great Meeting here on Wednesday after the cancelled Meeting in May due to the car accident in which I suffered some injuries. Have mostly recovered now and can type again so no more excuses for not writing a Review. Will try to incorporate information from both of the last two Meetings to make up for the missing Review.
At the Meeting in May, Margaret F. read a fictionalized chapter from “Babes In The Wood” in which she tells about a young Clifford Olsen who was always in trouble and had a penchant for torturing birds. While his father was horrified, his mother seemed to make excuses for him. It should be interesting to see how Margaret ties this in with the rest of the investigation of the murdered children found in Stanley Park.
At two different Meetings, Luke read about Goren still at the cave where he killed the snake. He skins and cooks it and shares the meat with the celiat and then cleans up and prepares the skin and head to transport home as trophies. He decides to wait for sunrise before travelling and remembers the past when he decided to stay out of the combat troops of the military, in spite of what others thought. He became a lone hunter, like the celiat, which slept beside his tent that night.
Charity read twice about Trixie. After the girl had killed Brett, she takes his boots and knife and runs, afraid of being caught. She runs a zig-zag pattern to make it hard for Marley and his posse to track her. Hidden among the rocks in the sweltering heat, she sees the minister on horseback, sitting and watching the valley below. She forces herself not to move, trying to outlast his vigilance. Lots of tension in this scene.
Annette also read at both Meetings from the story she had started. Maxine was wanting to end a relationship with a man named Jarod. But he had been injured in a motorcycle accident and she needed to take time off work even though her boss wanted her to leave the man. She is at the hospital and meets a Ray Matthews, dressed in a coat and stethoscope, who tells her about Jarod’s injuries and asks for her signature for Jarod to have surgery. She questions the legality of her signing for that, but is told since there is no other family and that she had previously been designated temporary substitute decision maker, that her signature was valid. She realizes that Jarod will probably live and recover and that he needs her to help with that, but consequently she would have no freedom. Desperation is sometimes born of sacrifice to the needs of others.
I had read two Honey stories. In May I read “Reluctant Mr. Fixit” about Honey telling me he was done after doing three chores for me at home. Then I read “Lost And Found” about our road trip to Thunder Bay and the trials and tribulations of so much togetherness, ameliorated upon finding home again.
Guy didn’t read in May, but did at the last Meeting. He said he is just jotting down events in rough draft and read this time about George as a teen living with his grandmother, and being more interested in partying and drinking with his friends than school. He had a dream of being a pilot, though, and applied for ROTC with the Air Force. His application was accepted but when he went for the physical exam it was discovered that he was colour blind and his dream was denied.
Crystal Colligan was a new member who joined us for the first time on Wednesday. She writes mostly poetry and shared with us that a lot of her writing was about being recovered from anorexia. She read to us a poem entitled “Broken Things”, and it was raw, pulsating pain trying to survive past hurts and re-invent herself, and not at all sure of who she should be. This poem was naked emotion on the page and we hope will find publication somewhere. And Crystal did say she writes a blog, so we will have to ask where to find it.
Somebody asked me if the Rams were going to take some time out during the summer, and I replied I didn’t know. So give that some thought. In the past we have sometimes taken the month of August off, so if people want to do that, we can. I don’t have any travel plans this summer, so to keep having Meetings during July and August is fine with me if others want to attend. We will decide at the next Meeting, which will be Wednesday, June 21st at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. I look forward to seeing you then, which will be the longest day of the year!
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Friday, April 21, 2017
THE REVIEW
DEDICATED DUET
Luke and I were the only Rams here on Wednesday night. Charity had come down with a cold and Kay said she had to work late. I don’t know what happened with anyone else. But Luke and I had lots of time to discuss various issues, which was enjoyable.
I read first, a short piece called “Haunted” which was a second place winner in the Wired Monk writing contest back in 2005. It was about the guilt I felt after refusing to give money to a pregnant woman who stopped me at a fast food restaurant and said she hadn’t eaten in three days.
Luke read the next scene in his novel, which has Goren in the den of the spine snake, which is littered with the bones of previous victims. He is engaged in a battle with the snake but is able to pin it to the ground and then he slices its head off to take as a trophy. He lets the other animal live and they both dine on snake meat. Later in the chapter some backstory explains about Goren’s preference for tracking and exploring over military combat. After betrayal at school, he prefers solitude and freedom. The conflict for Goren will be in learning to accept help from others. I asked Luke if he could put more tension into the battle with the snake to better engage the reader. That’s when Luke said he is much more a world builder than an adventurer and that he prefers reading all the detail of foreign environments himself. It’s true there are all kinds of readers and that tastes differ enormously. Being a girl who doesn’t like snakes, I needed something to entice me to keep reading.
I then read another “Honey” story, this one called “Face To Face”. It’s about when I wanted a new cell phone mostly for taking pictures but ended up with an Android that has internet access on it with Wi-Fi, and how I became so absorbed with using it that Honey had to email me to get my attention. He had tried calling me with it but I didn’t know how to get out of the game I was playing and answer the phone. Luke said he liked the story and thought it was funny.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, May 3rd at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Keep writing even though it’s spring and you want to be outside playing!
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Luke and I were the only Rams here on Wednesday night. Charity had come down with a cold and Kay said she had to work late. I don’t know what happened with anyone else. But Luke and I had lots of time to discuss various issues, which was enjoyable.
I read first, a short piece called “Haunted” which was a second place winner in the Wired Monk writing contest back in 2005. It was about the guilt I felt after refusing to give money to a pregnant woman who stopped me at a fast food restaurant and said she hadn’t eaten in three days.
Luke read the next scene in his novel, which has Goren in the den of the spine snake, which is littered with the bones of previous victims. He is engaged in a battle with the snake but is able to pin it to the ground and then he slices its head off to take as a trophy. He lets the other animal live and they both dine on snake meat. Later in the chapter some backstory explains about Goren’s preference for tracking and exploring over military combat. After betrayal at school, he prefers solitude and freedom. The conflict for Goren will be in learning to accept help from others. I asked Luke if he could put more tension into the battle with the snake to better engage the reader. That’s when Luke said he is much more a world builder than an adventurer and that he prefers reading all the detail of foreign environments himself. It’s true there are all kinds of readers and that tastes differ enormously. Being a girl who doesn’t like snakes, I needed something to entice me to keep reading.
I then read another “Honey” story, this one called “Face To Face”. It’s about when I wanted a new cell phone mostly for taking pictures but ended up with an Android that has internet access on it with Wi-Fi, and how I became so absorbed with using it that Honey had to email me to get my attention. He had tried calling me with it but I didn’t know how to get out of the game I was playing and answer the phone. Luke said he liked the story and thought it was funny.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, May 3rd at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Keep writing even though it’s spring and you want to be outside playing!
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Thursday, April 6, 2017
THE REVIEW
HIGH FIVE
Five of us met last night in spite of the rain. Shannon, Luke, Charity and Guy all joined me for an awesome evening of readings and conversation.
Charity read first, from “Trixie Trouble”, her next chapter. Trixie goes back to where her Pa had been hung, missing him, and she finishes off the flask of brandy. She nods off and dreams of her Pa, but is awakened by Brett Marley who assaults and tries to rape her. In a desperate struggle, she shoots him with his own shotgun. This chapter was a total surprise as it was in stark contrast to previous humorous chapters. Charity says she likes to surprise the reader.
Luke is working on his novel “The Heart Of The Earth” and has added a new first chapter, with the character Gorin. We see him hunting a beast known as a celiat, following it up a mountain. He suspects the beast is also hunting something. But when he follows it into a cave and finds it collapsed, he realizes the beast had been used to lure him, a bigger catch, into the cave of a spine snake. We don’t know yet who is at the top of the food chain here.
Guy didn’t read anything. He says he’s trying to sort out what he wants to write about the life of a seventeen year old boy. Guy did ask us about copyright. We all agreed that writers are automatically the owners of copyright to their work but if they want to register the copyright they can do so for a fee at the Copyright Office of the Canadian Intellectual Property Office. However, it is still up to the owner to do the policing for any possible theft of reproductive rights of their own material.
Shannon read Chapter 1 of her novel, “Senior Citizens’ Serial Killer”. As the ambulance sits outside Howard’s trailer where he died on top of Bethany, a crowd of seniors gathers outside, fueling the gossip mill. Julie, a private investigator wanting to be a detective, is there with two friends, speculating about the possibility of a crime having been committed, when the police arrive. Shannon wasn’t happy with this chapter and plans to re-write it to add more excitement to the appearance of an ambulance in this quiet seniors’ community.
I read “Honey’s Next Degree” about Honey suffering while I underwent surgery, and then finding his feet when he had to obtain specific medical and mobility aids for my recovery. He used his engineering skills to source the right equipment. I did say I had finished editing the collection and am now formatting the manuscript. I was struggling with inserting a table of contents, but Shannon gave me a tip I will try. And I still have to decide if I will submit hard copy or email copy to the publisher I’m thinking about. Charity said she thinks hard copy probably garners more attention than an email. A large chunk of actual mail is harder to ignore.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, April 19th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Happy Easter to all the Rams in the meantime, and eat all those chocolate bunnies for me since I can’t have them any more.
TONGUE IN CHEEK: A bibliophile is one who loves or collects books, while a biblioklept is one who steals them.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Five of us met last night in spite of the rain. Shannon, Luke, Charity and Guy all joined me for an awesome evening of readings and conversation.
Charity read first, from “Trixie Trouble”, her next chapter. Trixie goes back to where her Pa had been hung, missing him, and she finishes off the flask of brandy. She nods off and dreams of her Pa, but is awakened by Brett Marley who assaults and tries to rape her. In a desperate struggle, she shoots him with his own shotgun. This chapter was a total surprise as it was in stark contrast to previous humorous chapters. Charity says she likes to surprise the reader.
Luke is working on his novel “The Heart Of The Earth” and has added a new first chapter, with the character Gorin. We see him hunting a beast known as a celiat, following it up a mountain. He suspects the beast is also hunting something. But when he follows it into a cave and finds it collapsed, he realizes the beast had been used to lure him, a bigger catch, into the cave of a spine snake. We don’t know yet who is at the top of the food chain here.
Guy didn’t read anything. He says he’s trying to sort out what he wants to write about the life of a seventeen year old boy. Guy did ask us about copyright. We all agreed that writers are automatically the owners of copyright to their work but if they want to register the copyright they can do so for a fee at the Copyright Office of the Canadian Intellectual Property Office. However, it is still up to the owner to do the policing for any possible theft of reproductive rights of their own material.
Shannon read Chapter 1 of her novel, “Senior Citizens’ Serial Killer”. As the ambulance sits outside Howard’s trailer where he died on top of Bethany, a crowd of seniors gathers outside, fueling the gossip mill. Julie, a private investigator wanting to be a detective, is there with two friends, speculating about the possibility of a crime having been committed, when the police arrive. Shannon wasn’t happy with this chapter and plans to re-write it to add more excitement to the appearance of an ambulance in this quiet seniors’ community.
I read “Honey’s Next Degree” about Honey suffering while I underwent surgery, and then finding his feet when he had to obtain specific medical and mobility aids for my recovery. He used his engineering skills to source the right equipment. I did say I had finished editing the collection and am now formatting the manuscript. I was struggling with inserting a table of contents, but Shannon gave me a tip I will try. And I still have to decide if I will submit hard copy or email copy to the publisher I’m thinking about. Charity said she thinks hard copy probably garners more attention than an email. A large chunk of actual mail is harder to ignore.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, April 19th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Happy Easter to all the Rams in the meantime, and eat all those chocolate bunnies for me since I can’t have them any more.
TONGUE IN CHEEK: A bibliophile is one who loves or collects books, while a biblioklept is one who steals them.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Friday, March 17, 2017
THE REVIEW
THE GIFT OF THE GAB
Luke, Charity and Annette all joined me Wednesday and it was so nice to see Annette again after such a long absence. With only 4 of us present, we had lots of time for catching up with each other.
Luke read his final chapter that has Dalin cleaned up and in his new uniform, going to pick out the soldiers he will take with him to the city. Torch is one he wants but she resists until he assures her he needs her to watch his back, mostly as a friend he trusts. The ending of this chapter wrapped things up nicely, but also left room for continuation in a later story. Well done.
Charity read the next chapter about Trixie Trouble, after she runs from the barn when Fat Marley says he wants to become mayor. Donovan follows her and declines the brandy she offers. The two of them argue and he leaves. She is devastated that people who killed her father for horse stealing would elect for mayor someone who stole even more from people.
I read a ‘Honey’ story, “Friday The Thirteenth”, which shows a cast of strange characters at the local Legion branch one Friday night. Luke and Charity both wanted me to make the ending less abrupt and I will see what I can do with it.
Annette didn’t have a story to read, but shared with us the plot she has devised for a mystery night she has planned for ladies at her church. After a party, there is theft of some jewels and participants are given clues and alibis and must discover who stole the jewels. Annette promised to advise us of who the culprit was after the mystery night.
Kay, Guy and Shannon were all unable to attend but we hope to see them again soon. Kay has said she will come back the middle of April. Guy said he will come back the next Meeting. And Annette has said she will come back in May. I look forward to seeing them all.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, April 5th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. So kiss the Blarney Stone today and write down all the words that flow!
Tomorrow, Saturday the 18th, I’m meeting Kay at the Lemon Bakery in Langley City at noon for probably a couple of hours for lunch, writing, gabbing, or whatever. If you want to join our writers’ corner there, you are welcome.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
My Motto: Hook, Line and Printer!
Luke, Charity and Annette all joined me Wednesday and it was so nice to see Annette again after such a long absence. With only 4 of us present, we had lots of time for catching up with each other.
Luke read his final chapter that has Dalin cleaned up and in his new uniform, going to pick out the soldiers he will take with him to the city. Torch is one he wants but she resists until he assures her he needs her to watch his back, mostly as a friend he trusts. The ending of this chapter wrapped things up nicely, but also left room for continuation in a later story. Well done.
Charity read the next chapter about Trixie Trouble, after she runs from the barn when Fat Marley says he wants to become mayor. Donovan follows her and declines the brandy she offers. The two of them argue and he leaves. She is devastated that people who killed her father for horse stealing would elect for mayor someone who stole even more from people.
I read a ‘Honey’ story, “Friday The Thirteenth”, which shows a cast of strange characters at the local Legion branch one Friday night. Luke and Charity both wanted me to make the ending less abrupt and I will see what I can do with it.
Annette didn’t have a story to read, but shared with us the plot she has devised for a mystery night she has planned for ladies at her church. After a party, there is theft of some jewels and participants are given clues and alibis and must discover who stole the jewels. Annette promised to advise us of who the culprit was after the mystery night.
Kay, Guy and Shannon were all unable to attend but we hope to see them again soon. Kay has said she will come back the middle of April. Guy said he will come back the next Meeting. And Annette has said she will come back in May. I look forward to seeing them all.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, April 5th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. So kiss the Blarney Stone today and write down all the words that flow!
Tomorrow, Saturday the 18th, I’m meeting Kay at the Lemon Bakery in Langley City at noon for probably a couple of hours for lunch, writing, gabbing, or whatever. If you want to join our writers’ corner there, you are welcome.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
My Motto: Hook, Line and Printer!
Saturday, March 4, 2017
THE REVIEW
FOUR LIONS
There were four Rams here on Wednesday, trying to roar like lions to bring in the first of March. We all had something to read, which made for a good start to the month.
Luke read first, his next chapter with Dalin and the General. The General admitted to Dalin there had been a spy among his support staff, but he blamed Dalin publicly to fool the spy, Commander Sark, and catch him. Dalin was promoted to Commader of Capital Garrison, and the General asked him to defend the city. We asked Luke if he could break up the constant dialogue in this chapter with relevant action on the part of the characters. And since it was not the end of the book, I thought it could use a small hook at the end rather than what seemed like closure. Now that I’m thinking again about the reading, I want to ask Luke if this piece was all one point of view, or if there was a switch made within this scene. You know me, I’m a stickler for not changing point of view willy-nilly in the same scene.
Guy read to us some more about George, called “Lost Upon Discovery”. We’re told George worked on one family farm where he socialized with the daughters, then went to work at a chicken eviscerating plant. As his mother wanted him back in school, he then went to live with another family where he did farm chores in return for room and board while he went to school. We suggested Guy give us some dialogue between characters and more detail of these various settings, and some idea of what George was thinking and feeling at the time. It’s great that Guy is listing all these events, but the reader needs more to connect with the character and care about him. However, it is becoming clear that George just packs up and moves on whenever something isn’t working out.
Shannon has written and published one cozy mystery called “Mobile Home Murder” in digital format with Amazon. She plans to write a series based on the shenanigans of seniors in a mobile home park in Florida. Her parents live in such a place and she has visited them and knows whereof she writes. She read to us the prologue of her second book “Senior Citizen Serial Killer”. It shows us a 68 year old Gertrude physically pinned on the bed by a very dead 89 year old lover on top of her. She can’t get him off her and is terrified of what everyone will think of her. Her predicament is revealed with humour and insight and we look forward to hearing more.
I read another ‘Honey’ story I’ve edited. This was “Don’t Rock The Boat” about a funny attempt for us to watch the Canada Day fireworks over Lake Okanagan, with family and a friend, from onboard a houseboat when the barbecue catches fire and the boat rocks precariously as some passengers scramble to discard marijuana as the police boat approaches with siren wailing.
Margaret Moffatt’s goodbye to readers of Today’s Senior Newsmagazine was published in their March issue. We really hope her health will improve that she might again write and submit her articles on the history of B.C.
Kay and Charity were unable to attend, but Kay did say she had published her script, “Porcelain”. We wish her luck with it.
We give thanks to Guy for the chocolates he brought, which he and Luke seemed to really enjoy. Do I dare ask them if chocolate is as good as…..?
Next Meeting will be Wednesday, March 15th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Look forward to seeing you then.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
There were four Rams here on Wednesday, trying to roar like lions to bring in the first of March. We all had something to read, which made for a good start to the month.
Luke read first, his next chapter with Dalin and the General. The General admitted to Dalin there had been a spy among his support staff, but he blamed Dalin publicly to fool the spy, Commander Sark, and catch him. Dalin was promoted to Commader of Capital Garrison, and the General asked him to defend the city. We asked Luke if he could break up the constant dialogue in this chapter with relevant action on the part of the characters. And since it was not the end of the book, I thought it could use a small hook at the end rather than what seemed like closure. Now that I’m thinking again about the reading, I want to ask Luke if this piece was all one point of view, or if there was a switch made within this scene. You know me, I’m a stickler for not changing point of view willy-nilly in the same scene.
Guy read to us some more about George, called “Lost Upon Discovery”. We’re told George worked on one family farm where he socialized with the daughters, then went to work at a chicken eviscerating plant. As his mother wanted him back in school, he then went to live with another family where he did farm chores in return for room and board while he went to school. We suggested Guy give us some dialogue between characters and more detail of these various settings, and some idea of what George was thinking and feeling at the time. It’s great that Guy is listing all these events, but the reader needs more to connect with the character and care about him. However, it is becoming clear that George just packs up and moves on whenever something isn’t working out.
Shannon has written and published one cozy mystery called “Mobile Home Murder” in digital format with Amazon. She plans to write a series based on the shenanigans of seniors in a mobile home park in Florida. Her parents live in such a place and she has visited them and knows whereof she writes. She read to us the prologue of her second book “Senior Citizen Serial Killer”. It shows us a 68 year old Gertrude physically pinned on the bed by a very dead 89 year old lover on top of her. She can’t get him off her and is terrified of what everyone will think of her. Her predicament is revealed with humour and insight and we look forward to hearing more.
I read another ‘Honey’ story I’ve edited. This was “Don’t Rock The Boat” about a funny attempt for us to watch the Canada Day fireworks over Lake Okanagan, with family and a friend, from onboard a houseboat when the barbecue catches fire and the boat rocks precariously as some passengers scramble to discard marijuana as the police boat approaches with siren wailing.
Margaret Moffatt’s goodbye to readers of Today’s Senior Newsmagazine was published in their March issue. We really hope her health will improve that she might again write and submit her articles on the history of B.C.
Kay and Charity were unable to attend, but Kay did say she had published her script, “Porcelain”. We wish her luck with it.
We give thanks to Guy for the chocolates he brought, which he and Luke seemed to really enjoy. Do I dare ask them if chocolate is as good as…..?
Next Meeting will be Wednesday, March 15th at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Look forward to seeing you then.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Saturday, February 18, 2017
THE REVIEW
GENERATION X
Had a great turnout for the Meeting on Wednesday. Shannon, Jason, Luke, Guy, Charity and Kay all joined me in honour of The Muse. Guy is my generation, but everyone else is much younger and the difference in age and experience was brought home to me three times. Once was when I said my favourite author, Stuart McLean had passed away, and somebody didn’t know who that was or what the Vinyl Café was. Then Guy and I mentioned the book “Lady Chatterley’s Lover” and we were the only two who knew about its importance in ‘sex education’ during our formative years. And then I read a “Honey” story about a birthday lunch at the Seniors’ Center, and everyone looked blank and politely refrained from comment. Too funny. I am just so thankful to see the younger generation is interested in writing and storytelling and hope they find The Rams a comfortable place to share their musings, in spite of my elderly presence.
Guy read first, a short piece that is the beginning of a biography about George. He is a young man in the 1950’s who is trying to figure out where he belongs in the world and what he should be doing with his life. We asked Guy if he could add some more detail to the story to better inform the reader of its setting and of George’s thoughts and feelings at the time.
Kay is working on a movie script about a Canadian girl and her misfortunate trip abroad. She explained to us how the story plot has to have precise timing in order to fit the parameters of a movie.
Luke read his next scene where Dalin is taken before the General and they discuss his possible punishment. But then the General says Dalin was right, that there was a spy. That’s a wonderful hook to end the scene, or chapter.
Shannon told us she produces a comic strip with her husband. She writes the story, and he does the graphics. They post a new episode online each week and have about 80,000 followers. It’s about a 30 year old male and his dog, trying to make his way in the world.
Charity read the next chapter from “Trixie Trouble”, and we see her in the hot barn during the church service, with all the sinners from the night before. Donovan tells her that her debt has been paid, that she is safe. Then Fat Marley announces he has absolved all gambling debts and hands out leaflets saying he is running for mayor. Trixie turns and runs out of the church for her own salvation.
I read “The Birthday Gift”, about Honey taking me to the Seniors’ Center for lunch on my 62nd birthday, and realizing I was still pretty young in comparison to other attendees.
Jason said he had contacted Good Reads and asked some beta readers to read “Provoked” and give him some reviews. He had been going to read us one or more, but the conversation segued into Jason saying he is going to leave writing for the time being and move on to other things in his life. On leaving the Meeting, he told me he will let me know any time he plans to attend any Meeting in the future. We all wish Jason well and will miss him greatly.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, March 1st, at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Hope to see you then. And may the vault of your inspiration be unlocked and open wide for you.
TONGUE IN CHEEK: What did the thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
Had a great turnout for the Meeting on Wednesday. Shannon, Jason, Luke, Guy, Charity and Kay all joined me in honour of The Muse. Guy is my generation, but everyone else is much younger and the difference in age and experience was brought home to me three times. Once was when I said my favourite author, Stuart McLean had passed away, and somebody didn’t know who that was or what the Vinyl Café was. Then Guy and I mentioned the book “Lady Chatterley’s Lover” and we were the only two who knew about its importance in ‘sex education’ during our formative years. And then I read a “Honey” story about a birthday lunch at the Seniors’ Center, and everyone looked blank and politely refrained from comment. Too funny. I am just so thankful to see the younger generation is interested in writing and storytelling and hope they find The Rams a comfortable place to share their musings, in spite of my elderly presence.
Guy read first, a short piece that is the beginning of a biography about George. He is a young man in the 1950’s who is trying to figure out where he belongs in the world and what he should be doing with his life. We asked Guy if he could add some more detail to the story to better inform the reader of its setting and of George’s thoughts and feelings at the time.
Kay is working on a movie script about a Canadian girl and her misfortunate trip abroad. She explained to us how the story plot has to have precise timing in order to fit the parameters of a movie.
Luke read his next scene where Dalin is taken before the General and they discuss his possible punishment. But then the General says Dalin was right, that there was a spy. That’s a wonderful hook to end the scene, or chapter.
Shannon told us she produces a comic strip with her husband. She writes the story, and he does the graphics. They post a new episode online each week and have about 80,000 followers. It’s about a 30 year old male and his dog, trying to make his way in the world.
Charity read the next chapter from “Trixie Trouble”, and we see her in the hot barn during the church service, with all the sinners from the night before. Donovan tells her that her debt has been paid, that she is safe. Then Fat Marley announces he has absolved all gambling debts and hands out leaflets saying he is running for mayor. Trixie turns and runs out of the church for her own salvation.
I read “The Birthday Gift”, about Honey taking me to the Seniors’ Center for lunch on my 62nd birthday, and realizing I was still pretty young in comparison to other attendees.
Jason said he had contacted Good Reads and asked some beta readers to read “Provoked” and give him some reviews. He had been going to read us one or more, but the conversation segued into Jason saying he is going to leave writing for the time being and move on to other things in his life. On leaving the Meeting, he told me he will let me know any time he plans to attend any Meeting in the future. We all wish Jason well and will miss him greatly.
The next Meeting will be Wednesday, March 1st, at 7:00 p.m. here at my place. Hope to see you then. And may the vault of your inspiration be unlocked and open wide for you.
TONGUE IN CHEEK: What did the thesaurus eat for breakfast? A synonym roll.
Lisa A. Hatton
Author
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